A new Dawn ?

Beginning to miss Dawn Primarolo ? Wondering whether we would ever see her like again ? Good news. Not wanting to disappoint, Yvette Cooper, recently appointed Chief Secretary to the Treasury, is wasting no time whatsoever in fulfilling her early promise as an imbecile whose ministerial existence we can all loath with impunity.

Taking a break from helping herself to a shedload of taxpayers' money to pay for the Balls Family property portfolio, Ms. Cooper has helpfully explained to us proles that we are all being rather dim in not understanding the proposed new domicile related legislation. Ms. Cooper is an economist who struggles to talk coherently about the economy. Quite what grounds she has for telling lawyers they are unable to construe laws is, perhaps, a question to be addressed when we've all stopped laughing ?

"There have been some misunderstandings as a result of some of the detail of the consultation document - things that were never intended - and we have clarified that. We think there are a series of things in the draft legislation - including around people's worldwide income and the approach that has been taken to that - that are not the clear policy intention of the Government and have never been so, but as a result of the way in which the wording is in the draft consultation document there have been misunderstandings. That is why we are clarifying it."

With a good laugh being hard to find in the tax world, we must hope that Ms. Cooper gets to stay in her post. With gems such as this in her early days, just think what stupifying drivel awaits us once she gets into a Primaroloesque stride in the standing committee debates on the Finance Bills.

But there may be a problem. Convention prevents two relatives being ministers in the same government department. With Ms. Cooper's husband, Blinky Balls, being touted as a replacement for Alistair Darling, as Chancellor, it would seemingly not be permissible to have a pair of Balls at the Treasury. Ms. Cooper would find herself shunted elsewhere. Now if we were looking for a reason why Alistair Darling must keep his job, that must be it. Hang on in there, Alistair, in the interests of comedy.